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Here are some tips for avoiding the dating drain and staying true to your introverted self.1. But introverts specifically can be thought of as having minds like an onion: to gain access to those inner layers requires significant peeling, done with sensitivity and patience.
Don't be surprised if you're misunderstood, because you will be. Because of this, you may be initially unfairly labeled as shy (a common misconception), nerdy, or aloof.
When I plunged into the dating scene after getting out of a long-term relationship, my immediate inclination was to "play" extrovert by setting up numerous dates in a week, to give everyone a chance, to give those I was on the fence about a second chance, and to stay out well past my bedtime, even if I felt like I was losing steam.
It took only a few weeks of this before I realized that dating was taking its toll and that I was becoming bad at it — failing to respond to texts and messages in a timely manner, rushing through dates with people I felt little connection with and, eventually finding myself leaving all of my dates with a nagging desire for the solace of my quiet apartment.
I need a lot of alone time, and that’s not really what dating is about! In fact, she’s like thousands of others out there in the dating world: an introvert.
If you’re an introvert too, you can probably relate to Sarah and might find comfort knowing that what you’re feeling is normal.
But when it comes to relationships, For one thing, “introverted” is not a one-size-fits-all label.
And don’t feel the need to play extrovert just to fit in. While boozing at a crowded bar may not be your thing, remember that a one-on-one date is where introverts really shine.Which is why, as a now-expert on the subject, this is my advice to all other extroverts looking to date an introvert.First of all, introverts make good partners for extroverts Dating an introvert was the best romantic choice I have ever made for myself.For example, your flavor of introversion might be, “Weekends are for family,” while another person’s might be, “Weekends are for solitude,” and a third person’s might be, “Weekends are for my three closest friends.” Your style of introversion might be “I could spend every night with that one special person,” while person’s might be, “I’m OK spending only weekends together.” Your introverted way of dealing with problems might be, “Let’s sit down right now with a bottle of wine and hash this out until it’s fixed,” while your partner’s might be, “Let me think about it for a few days and get back to you.” And, of course, introversion is only one small part of all the moving parts that make us who we are.While it is a handy and nonthreatening label, introversion reason someone is seeking space in your relationship.